There is a story about an old man who went to a wise person to seek wisdom. The wise person gave him directions: “Follow that road, go along the river,…” The old man followed the directions but couldn’t find wisdom. He went back to the wise person. The wise person gave him renewed directions: “Follow that road, climb that mountain, …”The old man followed the directions but couldn’t find wisdom. He returned to the wise person. “Now you’ve seen it for yourself. Wisdom isn’t out there. It can only be found inside. We just need to discover it.”
Discovering our own wisdom is a question of using our mind effectively.
I am fascinated by the work of the mind. It seems to me the most powerful tool we have available as human beings. If we know how to use our mind well, it enables us to adapt to new challenges and to grow in line with what circumstances require. New discoveries in the field of brain research prove our ability to transform our mind.
People sometimes tell me that the way they are is the way they are. I always challenge them. Yes, we are the way we are at any particular point. But we can function differently in the future. I have seen countless examples of it. Once we do it, we get a new sense of our own empowerment and possibilities.
For example, if we tend to react to particular situations in a particularly unhelpful way, we can change it. If we tend to delay decisions, if we tend to rush decisions, if we tend to have difficulties asserting ourselves, if we tend to get too much involved with work other people ought to do, if we tend to not listen well to others, if we tend to be insensitive to others, if we tend to impose our thinking on others, we can change it ….
In the book Immunity to Change we find a distinction between three plateaus of adult mental development (Kegan/ Lahey, 2009, P. 16): The socialized mind, the self–authoring mind and the self–transforming mind. The socialized mind is defined by norms and expectations of its environment and bases its actions on these. The self–authoring mind is able to evaluate and make choices independently of its environment. The self-transforming mind is able to identify the limits of its own authority and see the possibility of multiple ways of functioning. It is able to transform itself continuously through redesigning the framework within which it is operating. Kegan and Lahey demonstrate the importance of this ‘higher mental complexity’ for leaders in our faster, flatter, and more interconnected world. They argue that workers need to shift from socialized minds to self-authoring minds and leaders from self-authoring minds to self-transforming minds. (Kegan/Lahey, 2009, P. 16)
As human beings we think and function through our own ‘filters’ and ‘maps’. These are essentially the habitual ways in which we look at and interpret the world, based on past experiences. If we are able to change the ‘filters’ and ‘maps’, we are self–transforming. We stand back from our mind and shift the way we make meaning. ”Therefore when communicating, people with self-transforming minds (…) rather than inquiring within the framework of their design (seeking information that will advance their agenda), they are also inquiring about the design itself.” (Kegan/Lahey, 2009, P. 20)
So what can we do to develop a self-transforming mind? The most important is to regularly challenge our own assumptions and beliefs, our ‘filters’ with which we are viewing the world, ourselves and others, as these inform the way we do things. Essentially we need to start challenging our own thinking process!
As an example, if we tend to delay decisions, we may need to shift the way we make meaning about how much information will be good enough and about risk-taking. If we tend to do work other people ought to do, we may need to shift the way we make meaning about being in control and about ways of feeling satisfied. Or we may simply challenge our perspectives on issues that frustrate us day to day and adopt more empowering perspectives.
Transforming ourselves takes time. A developmental perspective will enable us approaching ourselves with a learning mindset through everything we experience. “(…)our message here (…).is not that you will need patience to take up a developmental perspective; it’s that taking up a developmental perspective will give you patience.”(Kegan/Lahey, 2009, P. 317)
How could we not have patience with ourselves to become better, more effective people, more resourceful to respond to life’s changing situation?
Reference: Kegan, R., Lahey, L.L., (2009), Immunity to Change, Boston, MA, Havard Business School Publishing