Become your future
We can be the sure shadows
on the wall of our history or
we allow the flying drops of dreams
into the present, now
At the start of my career I couldn’t open my mouth in front of five people. I was terrified I would say something stupid or lose my thread of thought. At a point I decided that I had to get over it. Back then I did not have an understanding of personal transformation but I figured out I had to embody the courage and the calmness I needed for it. I imagined I had courage and calmness and started to feel this in my body. Gradually I became the courage I needed to be to speak in front of people and step by step it became more comfortable.
Becoming someone different is never out there in the future. It can only happen now in this moment. If we want courage, we need to feel at least some courage now, if we want clarity, we need to feel at least some clarity now, if we want peacefulness, we need to feel at least a little peaceful now, if we want confidence, we got to feel at least a little bit confident now, if we want to feel love, we got to start feeling it now, at least 3 % or 5 %, at least 1 %.
To be able to feel a new quality, we have to learn to be fully present with ourselves in the moment – otherwise we can’t make a new choice. As human beings we basically function on automatic pilot. Our thoughts and emotions are based on significant experiences we had and years of practicing these over and over, thousands of times every day. These thoughts and emotions are wired in our brain and our body and are accompanied by chemicals produced in the body and electromagnetic frequencies we emit. The more we practice thoughts of fear, inadequacy or worry, the stronger these thoughts get wired in the brain. In my case I had significant experiences dating back to my school days that wired me for fear of speaking in front of groups of people.
And yes, we can change it. But just rationally thinking about wanting to change doesn’t typically do the job.
At any given moment physical sensations run though the body, in correspondence with our thoughts and emotions. Most people are not aware of their body most of the time, unless they feel pain. When we are not aware of the life inside our body, we tend to contract our muscles and our breathing in some way, in line with the habits we have come to embody over decades. In my case, fear was expressed as heat and tingling in my chest and head and a sensation of cold in other parts of my body. Once we are able to become present with what is going on physically, we can use a number of somatic practices and heart techniques to shift ourselves. Sensations in the body only exist in the present moment which means when we are aware of them, we are in the present moment and can chose to shift our body and our thoughts in that moment which in turn can shift our emotions.
It is difficult to hold fear in a body that is fully relaxed, upright and aware. When you are relaxed and aware, you can start embodying new qualities. You can start embodying a new leadership quality. You can start embodying a new person. Every moment presents a new opportunity to bring your desired future into the present.
PRACTICE
Identify a quality that you want to start to embody. Pay attention to your posture, breathing and sensations in your body. Just be aware. Straighten your spine, and relax any part of the body that is tense, for example shoulders or facial muscles. Slow down your breathing. Now focus on your heart. Imagine your heart breathing the desired quality (e.g. calmness) in and out, whilst feeling it. You can do this with eyes closed to go deeper. However, you also want to practice this during the day in different types of situations with your eyes open until being present becomes a new habit.
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